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Archive for March, 2012

In telling the stories the Elders made sense of The People’s everyday lives.

In telling the stories the Elders made sense of The People’s everyday lives.

Most traditional people just call themselves, The People. Other ways of describing traditional people is to say, First Nation People. These titles respect these people and indicate some sort of understanding of why identity is very important to THE PEOPLE.

In traditional lifestyles of our Australian Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islanders the role of The Elders was paramount. The Elders held the stories and the wisdom of the past. In telling the stories the Elders made sense of The People’s everyday lives.

Knowing that the earth provides just as a mother does must be respected and cherished. It not only makes sense but it is not a mystery to be solved or ignored. Elders gave counsel to those in need; listened to the problems of the group; helped shed light on difficult situations; told and guided the young and in return they were revered, nurtured, respected and cared for until they passed on in to the spirit world.

The People looked forward to passing on; they didn’t fear it. Passing on was not dying. Life after you pass on is not an issue if your life on earth has meaning.

Meaning was in everything. Every part of creation had meaning and purpose. The People relied on each other for their very existence. Without co-operation life was impossible.

Without The Elders where would life be?

The Elders had the answers to the questions of:
Who are we?
What are we doing on the planet?
What do we need to do and who do we need to be to give our life meaning and purpose?
(Notice how it is we not ‘I’ who is asking the questions but ‘we’)

Without The Elders life was meaningless and had no purpose.

Oh Great Spirit

Make me ever ready to come to you,
With clean hands and straight eyes,
So when life fades like a fading sunset,
My spirit may come to you without shame.

Yellow Hawk
Sioux Chief

In traditional life The People had more fulfilment in their physical, mental, emotional and spiritual lives. Every part was recognised as important. They viewed their lives as whole. Surviving was about 5-10 % of their time and the rest was devoted to living and being with the group; telling stories, participating in ceremonies and rituals and having fun. In Australia it lasted for tens of thousands of years until the white people came.

What appeared to be a simple and childlike culture was actually a rich and spiritually alive life. When the white people came they saw only the externals of the life of the Aboriginal people, only the outside; and because they didn’t value or even understand their own spiritual life, the white people didn’t know what to look for in others. This pattern was repeated in Australia and throughout the world for hundreds of years until The People of the world were colonised.

In the white people’s ignorance, they almost wiped out completely lifestyles that were based on spiritual understandings.

It is that spiritual understanding that we all long for today but are too busy doing our lives to stop and reflect on what has happened to both peoples in the process. So now we have an opportunity to learn from the very people we almost destroyed.

We now long for this less sophisticated and more balanced lifestyle. It’s often called a tree change, a sea change, early retirement, getting out of the rat race, to name a few.

Some questions to reflect on:

Where do we look for some answers?
Have we finally done the full circle of development?
Are our current systems serving the people they were designed to?
Is our world working for us?
What does it take for us to embrace change?
The simple fact is that what we are doing in the world isn’t working for most of ALL the people.
What are you going to do about your life?

Change starts with each of us. As an old Jewish saying goes, “If not you, then who? If not now, then when?”

I remember reading, “when the last whale is left to die on the ocean floor we may well have killed the most intelligent species on this earth”.

What do you think about all this?

Please join us in a conversation.

Wendie Batho

Wendie Batho

Wendie Batho

Wendie has co-facilitated residential programs with Petrea for more than sixteen years. Prior to that Wendie spent over 25 years as a teacher, school principal and was involved in educational leadership and facilitation of school executive groups.

Ten years of this time was spent in PNG where she taught and worked for the government. Wendie has been travelling since the early sixties and is especially attracted to Asian cultures. She holds degrees in Anthropology, Education, Sociology, Theology and Political Science. Her current passions are her grandchildren, travel biographies, exploring Asia, 4×4 driving, reading everything she can get her hands on, and watching movies on the big screen at home.

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Do you have control issues?  Has anyone told you that you are controlling?  This meditation will help you learn to let go.

Benefits

·      Makes life more pleasant for you and others

·      Helps you understand that everything changes

·      Helps you learn to let go of wanting to control everything

Do you always have to be on top?

Do you always have to be on top?

If you are a controlling person, it is important to get beyond your symptoms – your need to control the actions of your loved ones or to have the magazines on the coffee table just so – and ask yourself what you are afraid of.  Fear usually motivates the desire to control others or your physical space.

Meditation

When

If you have received many complaints about your controlling behaviour, you might want to try this meditation.

Preparation

Write about three occasions on which you can remember feeling anxiety and wanting to control someone else’s behaviour, even if it seemed justified to you at the time.

Practice

1.    Sit on a cushion or chair in your meditation space.  Watch your breath for five minutes.

2.    Choose one of the events you listed.  Try to recall it in detail.  Feel what you were feeling at the time.  Perhaps your partner moved a chair and didn’t move it back to where you had placed it when he or she left the room.  Was your first feeling one of anger?

3.    Ask yourself why it is so important to have things the way you want them, especially since you are sharing your life with another person.  If you weren’t feeling anger, would you feel fear?  Are you afraid something may happen unexpectedly and you will feel powerless, alone, abandoned?  Are you trying to ward off unexpected and hurtful things happening by trying to control your environment, the people around you and the future?  Explore the fear behind your need to control.

4.    Commit to letting go a little at a time on a daily basis by looking for the fear behind the need for you to control.  Relax your grip on things and notice that usually nothing terrible happens.  Be kind and patient with yourself in this process.

The Meditation Bible
Madonna Gauding

Alexia Miall

Alexia co-facilitates Meditate for Life (in Sydney) and Take a Stand for Life (in Bundanoon).

Alexia’s career began in banking and then moved via advertising to a major career change in 1980 to Adult and Transformational Education.  She has been privileged to share this incredible journey with 1000’s of like minded souls through her extensive experience as a facilitator, trainer, life coach, therapist, and mentor.  She managed her own training company in Victoria during the 1990’s, and during this time was the Course Leader for a training program from which the Banksia Environmental Foundation formed.

Alexia has acquired further education in Adult Education in Training; Somatic Psychotherapy; Life Coaching; Conflict Resolution; plus Accreditation in many behavioural and culture change models. She is an Associate of EcoSTEPS, a niche Sustainability consultancy, which supports her love of the natural environment.

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Suzanne recently sent this to the team with an update!

Suzanne recently sent this to the team with an update!

It was January 21st when I got the email about the 1 Million Kilo Challenge to lose weight and support a charity.   Well naturally my “how hard can it be?” attitude (that frequently sees me jumping in the deep end) enlisted me to raise money for Quest for Life.

That was fine, set up my page for fundraising etc.   Then the first moment of truth – how much do I actually weigh?   Let’s just say it was a lot more than I thought and reminded myself it is only a number and everything from here is for the better.

Still comfortable with my decision, sponsorship and donations came through to me, friends and family wanting to support my efforts and of course donate to Quest.   Now that hit me hard with the first donation.  I suddenly felt I really have to do something now.   I really have to be accountable.

I started with my weight on the top page of a notebook, and listed what I ate.  It made me accountable for the food I consume.  I also said to myself if I can do one 20 minute session of activity a day this would be a good start.   I work from home so it was easy to blow the dust off my Cardio Salsa DVD and exercise on a lunch break.   By the way I caught a sight of me doing cardio salsa in a reflection of a mirror at home; I never laughed so much in my life. (editors note: Suzanne wouldn’t give us a photo of this!)

I lost 3.6kg in the first week or so, I was feeling great.  Then life stepped in.  I found my self busier than ever with work, home, the children, and my course I am doing.   My regime fell by the wayside.   The food diary became quite vague; I missed exercise here and there.   I ate too much, and of the wrong food.  I basically put myself again at the bottom of the list.  I got to the point where I feared jumping on the scales.

I began to experience guilt, for all those people who had supported me and Quest for Life.  I remember on one occasion I actually stood up tall and sucked in my tummy when I was face to face with someone who had sponsored me.  Well that was the moment when it became apparent it would actually just be easier to exercise than live behind a false façade.

I jumped on the scales, no surprise I put back on 3.6kg.   I exercised at lunch, first day only 10 minutes.   I began to walk to the post office and to the local shops instead of car.   What I needed to change was the way I was looking at the long term goal – I had to break it down.   I began living in the moment and every choice I need to make I think about my health and well being.     When I am hungry – I have a choice what to eat.   I found myself actually putting the bread back in the wrapper and for a better option – a salmon salad.

It is my individual choices throughout the day that have allowed me to lose 4.3Kg and if you add the initial 3.6kg I lost (and regained) – that is 7.9kg.

Today I walked to get the Sunday papers, I wore my new trousers I had bought just before the challenge (a snug fit they were) and today they hang off my hips.  A wonderful feeling of achievement!!

What I learnt – the secret of making any change in your life can be linked to just making the right choices one at a time in direction to your goal.  The measure of your success is the sum total of all your choices.

If you would like to support any of the Team at Quest taking this Million Kilo Challenge;

http://www.everydayhero.com.au/ann_burns_5

http://www.everydayhero.com.au/suzanne_bastin

http://www.everydayhero.com.au/margie_braunstein

http://www.everydayhero.com.au/petrea_king

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Tim Bailey explores the spa

Tim Bailey explores the spa

On Monday night Network Ten’s resident weather man, Tim Bailey, did the weather cross from our great friends at Gillian Adams Salon and Spa. Gillian and her team are wonderful supporters of ours and are shared their support on air tonight. Gillian and her team graciously pampered some of our Quest participants, who had a wonderful day with hair, make up and spa treatments.

There is a photo gallery on Facebook and if you missed the live cross, you can see the video here.

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Community Bounce Back

Community Bounce Back

Inidviduals and communities across Australia are still coming to terms with the 2011 natural disasters and some have been affected again in 2012.

Two well established and innovative not-for-profit organisations, Quest for Life Foundation (QFL) and Queensland Rural Regional and Remote Women’s Network (QRRRWN) have partnered to develop and deliver the “Community Bounce Back” program to assist these people in the months ahead.

Funded through the Tim Fairfax Family Foundation, a series of webinars, DVDs, a workbook and workshops have been developed to assist individuals and rural communities recovering from trauma.

The resources have been developed and are now being made available free online for individuals everywhere to access.

Georgie Somerset, President of QRRRWN says “We are excited to be able to share these resources with the wider community”.

“Trialling this pilot program in Queensland, and with workshops on the way in St George and Theodore, we know these resources can make a difference in people’s lives, and we are delighted to see the resources go online and spread far and wide.”

Susie Cameron, Business Development Manager for Quest for Life adds “We’re  proud to be able to provide these valuable no cost resources to individuals and communities across Australia”.

“The resources give people strategies to assist them in the process of recovering from the trauma of lost lives, property and livelihoods. They are for anyone recovering from traumatic events, grief, depression and anxiety.”

The resources available online include, three DVDs and a workbook. Quest for Life Founder Petrea King and facilitator Wendie Batho will be presenting workshops in Theodore and St George throughout March, April and May 2012.

For more information or to access resources online:

http://www.questforlife.com.au/trauma-recovery-program

http://www.qrwn.org.au/community-recovery.php

or contact QRRRWN on 1300 795 571 or Quest for Life on 02 4883 6599

MEDIA CONTACT

The Queensland Rural Regional and Remote Women’s Network (QRRRWN pronounced Q-REN) was established in 1993 to meet the needs of women in rural communities throughout the state. Since then it has grown into a progressive organisation running a series of programs in regional centres as well as being involved at a national and international level. The focus is on all rural women and their families, communities and enterprises.

QRRRWN – Media
Karen Brook – 0438 022 006
karen@qrwn.org.au

Quest for Life programs provide practical techniques and strategies, enabling participants, despite their circumstances, to feel more confident in their ability to meet whatever challenges they face.

Quest For Life – Media

Susie Cameron 0411 663 926

susie@questforlife.com.au

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Wendie's Favourite Authors

Wendie's Favourite Authors

“Healing may not be so much about getting better, as about letting go of everything that isn’t you – all of the expectations, all of the beliefs – and becoming who you are.”

Rachel Naomi Remen

Over many years of facilitating groups and being involved in workshops around Australia I often get asked, “Can you suggest some women authors I can read in addition to Petrea’s work?”

Here is a quick  list of authors I have enjoyed . They are listed in no particular order.

Pema Chodron
a Buddhist nun who is essential reading on forgiveness

Shakti Gawain
teaches similar concepts to Quest

Rachel Naomi Remen
a medical doctor who teaches health professions to care for themselves. Rachel is a must read. Rachel and Petrea know each other.

Susan Trout
runs an organisation that teaches in a similar way to Quest.

Christianne Northrop
a medical doctor who is passionate about women’s health.

Joan Borysenko
another wonderful writer who runs workshops. She wrote a comment in Petrea’s, Quest for Life 2nd edition.

Jean Houston
best to google her as she is very active on the topic of Consciousness.

Barbara Hubbard
google her as she has a lot to offer and has online courses. She has been in the field as long as Louise Hay.

Louise Hay
a legend in her time. You may have heard of Hay House Publishing.

Caroline Myss
started her career as a book publisher and look at her now!

Candice Pert
a leader in the field of epigenetics

Marianne Williamson
has a holistic Christian approach that shines through in a non-religious way.

If you have any:
Names to add to the list or questions about these authors please let us know.
If you have additional authors we’d love to hear.

Wendie Batho

Wendie Batho

Wendie Batho

Wendie has co-facilitated residential programs with Petrea for more than sixteen years. Prior to that Wendie spent over 25 years as a teacher, school principal and was involved in educational leadership and facilitation of school executive groups.

Ten years of this time was spent in PNG where she taught and worked for the government. Wendie has been travelling since the early sixties and is especially attracted to Asian cultures. She holds degrees in Anthropology, Education, Sociology, Theology and Political Science. Her current passions are her grandchildren, travel biographies, exploring Asia, 4×4 driving, reading everything she can get her hands on, and watching movies on the big screen at home.

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What are the ‘cats’ that you want to kick?

What are the ‘cats’ that you want to kick?

At Quest for Life, we often speak about reaction versus response. I experienced a lovely lesson about this recently and thought I would share it with you because I imagine I am not the only one experiencing reactions.

If I am not facilitating on a workshop, I usually work from home. One day recently I was at my computer, feeling a bit like an octopus.

I had at least 8 things happening on my computer desktop– emails, online banking, website, documents, spread sheets, noises telling me emails were arriving, I was half way through responding to a comment on Facebook then the phone rang and I had a short chat to a colleague plus I had stuff on my actual desk that needed sorting.  A typical work scenario… Do you know the feeling?

In the middle of this busy, lovely and full work day, the computer started to make a little tick, tick, tick noise. If you are not familiar with computers, this is the sound of the computer doing something in the background. It could be a security check or archiving something or goodness knows what (I certainly don’t) but what I do know is that everything   slows…down.

On this day, I was running a bit behind time so I kept working and typing but there was a long delay before the letters appeared on the screen… I could not access the website… it was frozen… emails would not download… I updated a field in the spread sheet and it closed down inexplicably… my screen froze and finally… my computer closed down without warning!

I gasped. Oh no! This cannot be happening. No, no ,no. A cataclysmic volcanic eruption was going off in my head. I wondered “have I lost all my work?” And then before I knew it … I was in the middle of a full blown REACTION!

Catastrophic thoughts about lost work and lost time raced through my mind and I WANTED TO KICK THE  $%#&^!!  COMPUTER!!!! My heart was racing. I felt really ANXIOUS.

I hope you get the idea. It felt very stressful.

Somewhere amidst all the panic, I took a metaphoric step back followed by real deep breath. I became aware that I was experiencing a reaction and I remembered Petrea’s words about reactions…”a reaction is a re activation of a past feeling happening in the present moment”.

I realised I was feeling the same panic I felt when I was four years and got lost at the Easter Show – out of control, unsafe and slightly hysterical.

I asked myself a good question… “Given this is happening, what is the best response for me to make right now”? The answers came quickly. “STOP. WAIT. THINK. Do not kick the computer as this will not help. The adrenaline running through my system is not helping. Calm down Margie…”

And I did.

I’m happy to report that the computer eventually restarted and all was well. Documents were recovered. Unsent emails were auto saved in the draft box. I had 10 minutes to reflect on my reactions and learn once again that I do have control over my attitude, my body and my state of mind. I could breathe again…

I wonder what situations push your buttons and fire up reactions inside you? What are the ‘cats’ that you want to kick? I would love to hear…

In the meantime, I’m thinking of giving my computer a name. What do you think of the name… Kitty?

Love to you all for now

Margie

Margie Braunstein

Margie Braunstein

Margie Braunstein

Margie is a somatic psychotherapist and counsellor providing psychotherapy services to the people of the Central Coast and Sydney.  Margie lives on the beautiful Central Coast with her husband, two children, two dogs and a cat.

Over the last 12 years, Margie has also been engaged in the design, delivery and marketing of transformational learning programs. During this time she has regularly facilitated personal development programs for up to 50 people on weekend workshops, week-long intensives and advanced programs of 3-4 months.

Margie has a Graduate Certificate in Adult Education from UTS, Diploma in Psychotherapy from the Australian College of Contemporary Somatic Psychotherapy and qualifications in somatic therapy, executive coaching and relationship counselling.

Margie has a passion for personal development and regards people with respect, empathy and compassion in the belief that while we all do the best we can, a little bit more kindness and care can lead to even greater peace and joy in life.

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Walking Meditation

Walking Meditation: gets you outside and moving, and reconnects you with your inner self.

I truly enjoy my Walking Meditation, it fulfills two functions, gets me outside and moving, and reconnects me with my inner self.

The following Informal Walking Meditation is very simple and easy to do.

On the Meditate for Life program, one of the many meditation techniques we teach is a form of Walking Meditation, again very simple and easy to do. So, I encourage you to give it a go and enjoy the outdoors whilst attending to your inner self. HAVE FUN.

Alexia Miall

INFORMAL WALKING MEDITATION

When we are too centered on our own internal dramas, too full of our own subconscious gossip, we become out of touch with the world around us.

Rediscover a sense of awareness by going for a walk.

The act of walking literally establishes contact with the ground, and the constant input of new images helps break up fixed moods, let in fresh air, and diverts attention from a fixation on problems.

This informal walking meditation does not require any particular technique of the body or hands and so can be performed anywhere – in a city street or a park, for example. It simply focuses on maintaining awareness.

1. Select a place in which you feel relatively secure. An unsafe part of town is not the right scene for a walking meditation.

2. First focus yourself, bringing your mind back to your clear intention to remain aware. The purpose of the exercise is to be fully present while you take your walk.

3. As you set off, feel the energy rising up from the ground to the top of your head. Consciously relax your body and mind. Let the motion of walking be easy and natural.

4. Let go of mental chatter, and focus attention on the sights, sounds, smells, and sensations of the environment around you as you walk.

5. When you notice that you have been thinking, come back to the sights and sounds around you. Simply acknowledge that you have been thinking, and return to the immediacy of the present moment.

From The Meditation Year – A Seasonal guide to contemplation, relaxation, and visualization
Jane Hope

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Over the past twenty seven years I have counselled many doctors when they have a diagnosis of cancer or other life threatening illness. Our conversations have not been about whether to embark upon rigorous treatments but on how to resolve painful issues from the past, heal their relationships and improve their quality, and sometimes quantity, of life through utilising complementary therapies. This article highlights a common perspective from medical colleagues.

A Doctor on How Physicians Face the End of Life

Petrea King

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All it takes is patience and practice.

All it takes is patience and practice.

Everyone wants to be happy.  We all want to feel healthy, loving and contented.

Yet, how?

Over many years I have studied, formally and informally, the findings of psychology, neurology and the great contemplative traditions of the world (mainly yoga and Buddhism and also Sufism).  And there are a plethora of very practical tools that can help us to feel less stressed, less reactive to disturbing experiences, more aware of our own bodies, and minds – more at peace.

Simply, if we want to be happy there are two ways to change our situation for the better.

  1. Improve the outer situation , i.e. work on our experiences, change the environment.
  2. 2. Improve the inner ‘situation’.

As we know, there are so many limitations to our ability to change the outer situation.  We have no power to change others, (disappointing!). Try getting a moody teenager to listen to your reason, or your partner to stop that annoying habit…

We don’t have much influence either over external things.  Sure, we can rearrange the furniture, buy new clothes, plant new trees, but eventually the furniture wears out, the clothes get stained or don’t fit, the rosebush gets black spots, the car gets rusty. The Botox doesn’t last…

If we continue to try to change the outer world we can (will) get sick, tired, depressed, anxious, disconnected, disheartened and burnt out.

If we focus on our inner world and changing that, it has countless benefits.

We have incredible influence over our thoughts our behaviours and our reactions. The key is becoming aware of them.  With a little effort we can feel more relaxed, let go of painful past experiences, control our attention, improve our mood and change our brain.

All it takes is patience and practice.

As many of us have said in these blogs before, meditation is key and we can use any Meditation practice we like.  We know that even a few minutes of Meditation will literally, physically change our brain, and thus our ‘minds’.

I will share next time a couple of simple practices I am currently using to do just this.  Stay tuned.

Love Bernadette

(Many thanks to the work of Rick Hanson a neuropsychologist, and researcher on happiness, love and wisdom)

Bernadette Arena

Bernadette Arena

Bernadette Arena

Bernadette has worked with the Quest for Life Foundation since early 2006 and is the Senior Facilitator on our residential programs.  Her work is treasured by our participants and our team. She has also been developing and refining a deep understanding of the use of appropriate yoga and meditation approaches for use in oncology and with serious illness.

Bernadette maintains close association with International Yoga Teachers Association and is a senior lecturer for their Teacher Training Course.  She has designed and delivered yoga teacher training courses for other organisations.  During 5 years in the UK she taught retreats, workshops and classes across the UK and in Europe and worked as a personal ‘lifestyle’ coach.  Bernadette brings a gentle and loving nature with insight and compassion borne out of her experience. She can assist a deeper connection with the body as a means to rejuvenate the spirit.

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